|One horrible picture of the Dreamsicle “Adult Milkshake”|
Mattie’s on Main recently opened in the old Kikugawa space and is owned by the same people who have Wilde Roast in the same building. While I like the idea of more businesses in Riverplace, and think a casual dining concept could be a good fit, I’ll be honest – I lost my excitement about Mattie’s as soon as I looked at the drink menu. I don’t know when I became a cocktail snob, but apparently I need to own it.
It’s not that I’m out every night drinking fancy craft whiskies or anything like that, but I’ve learned enough about cocktails in the past year or two that I know what I like and don’t like. Though it has nothing to do with the quality of the drinks, I don’t like places that mislabel things to make them sound like more than they are. Or mislabel them and are just plain wrong.
Looking at the beverage menu for Mattie’s makes it very obvious that I am not their target market. They have a decent draft beer list so kudos on that. But then they muck it up with their “Craft Martinis” menu. There’s very little craft in most of the drinks listed here, they read like college bar happy hour specials. Not a single one of their craft martinis is made with gin and the closest thing to a martini on the list is the “Dirty Girl,” made with vodka, dry vermouth, olive juice, and a blue cheese stuffed olive. The second drink on the the MARTINI menu starts by saying “This is a classic NEGRONI.” By now, I’ve just given up.
But, all that said, I was at an event at Wilde Roast and I’m a sucker for trying new places so my friend and I snuck over for one drink each. And despite all my snobbish whining above, I then ordered their “Adult Milkshake” of the day. It wasn’t really a fair fight, because it was Dreamsicle flavored. I can’t say no to orange cream anything. And I’ll admit, it was tasty. So if you’re in their target demographic, you’ll probably enjoy their drink menu. But for me, I’ll be back after they look up the definition of martini and rewrite their menu accordingly.